Mrs. Klopman's Revenge
Mrs. Klopman was told by her doctor that she had a fatal condition and would never outlive her husband. She immediately commissioned a world-famous portrait artist to paint her portrait, which was to be hung above the mantel in the living room. As she posed for the portrait, she instructed the artist to include a few things other than the famed Klopman diamond. "Paint on my wrist a three-tiered diamond tennis bracelet," she said. "Also, add on Tahitian black pearl earrings the size of grapes." She continued in this vein, asking him to paint several rings on her fingers and a ruby and diamond tiara for good measure. The artist did as he was told, and turned out a dazzling portrait.
When the job was finished, before he left, the artist said, "May I ask you a question, Mrs. Klopman?"
"Yes, go ahead," she replied.
"Well, painting the Klopman diamond was easy, but I had a heck of a time dreaming up all the other jewelry you wanted me to add on. Tell me, why did you want it?"
A crafty gleam lit Mrs. Klopman's eyes as she explained, "because when I'm dead and my husband brings the next Mrs. Klopman into this house, I want her to look at my portrait and go crazy trying to find all that stuff!"
